Wednesday, August 19, 2009
man.. what with lan and lit and library and applications.
sometimes, its so hard to make time.
sometimes, your ambiguity is driving me nuts.
sometimes, i fear all is lost.
sometimes, though, i know it isn't but am to afraid to take the first step.
sometimes, actually always, i fear that i will get thrown into a whole swallowing darkness.
sometimes, it is way too easy to lose focus and forget.
sometimes, its so much easier to detach yourself and not care.
sometimes, hoping is all there is.
sometimes, i just love the nature.
sometimes, i hate how these very surroundings make me go through crap.
sometimes, i regret and regret and regret.
sometimes, i ask myself 'why bother?'
sometimes, many times, many times.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
I NEED IDEAS
I NEED AN EPIPHANY
I NEED "LIGHTBULBS"
Sunday, July 19, 2009
some sort of a book review larh.
By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept, by Paulo Coelho
The protagonist, Pilar meets her childhood friend after about ten years of separation and the two of them have developed along separate courses.
Over the years, Pilar had learnt to bury her feelings and to plan ahead. But when she found her friend again, she found that he was still in love with her. Falling in love with him wasn't safe, but when the time came to choose, she chose to fall. She pushed aside "the Other"--the one who says "we must plan for tomorrow"--and she fell.
And the other thing was this: the man had a Big Dream. And he had to choose between Pilar and his Big Dream. And Pilar knew that she couldn't just wait for him to choose. She had to do something.
I'm waiting for that kind of love, the kind of love that will make me want to do something, to fight, whatever. I'm waiting for someone to say something like that to me:
"But I'm going to fight for your love," he continued.
"There are some things in life that are worth fighting for to the end."I was speechless.
"You are worth it," he said.
And I've also learnt that "it's better to lose some of the battles in the struggle for your dreams than to be defeated without ever even knowing what you're fighting for".
And in the end, I'm reminded that even when it feels like someone else has changed too much and we might have developed along separate courses, all rivers merge with the sea.
There, wait for your Halley's Comet. It comes round every 75-76 years. Once in a lifetime.
I'll make sure I know when I see it. And then, I'm going to hold on to it.
We'll learn that "men and women aren't enemies. Men and women are soulmates .And if they were just honest, right from the word go, then they'd all realize it. All this being mysterious and aloof is complete rubbish. Everyone should share their secrets straight away!" (Sophie Kinsella, Can You Keep A Secret?)
-that is just pure nonsense. it's the mystery that draws people together no?
aargh. complex subject.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
it's just how well you lose i guess, since ultimately you still lose.
i.e. just like malaysia vs. man united match. haha. nope. i wouldn't waste money on that,
but i happen to flip to the channel on tv. i shall not make any more open comments just in case i get apprehended by ISA or something:)
anyway, i played paintball. i got bruises! i managed to conquer half of my fear. half only mind you since i still didn't dare to run in front to get shot. that would be the ultimate experience! haha. and there was a few times during the game, that i had one of those "moments".
I suddenly felt how and why someone would want to go around shooting someone and holding a gun. gamers, i HALF understand you now.hah.
and i'm addicted to a korean show again!!it's been so long ever since i last watched one.
it's awesome la. about a third class mentally retarded guy who undergoes a surgery and becomes not just normal but wayyy smart. but it's those different values you get when you're a retard-turn-genius la that really hits me. not to mention the korean guy is just plain awesome.
although predictable, but come on, sometimes you watch it for the happy ending right? hopefully it is though. it's not finished yet..and i'm waiting for the weekend to come again!
KBS world. it does rock socks la.
Friday, July 3, 2009
Miss Wu Shin Yin
And people tell me blogging is unhealthy.
phebe got her driving license about 2 weeks ago finally.
without "pau"-ing. yes! save the world from evil!!
over and out.